LONG TIME NO SEE || REAL TALK

I almost don't know how to start this blog. I feel embarrassed (even if it's unwarranted). I keep asking myself why it is so hard to keep consistently producing content. My last post here was literally 6 months ago and then only a link to my YouTube channel. The channel faired a little bit better as I was able to keep making videos until about 2 months ago (You can check out some of the more recent videos: Andromeda's Totoro Themed Birthday party HERE or Karl's attempt to do my make-up HERE). But even that has tapered down to nothing and it's difficult to not be hard on myself.

Can you believe this one is 2??

And then I remember, I JUST HAD A F**KING BABY. Why do I keep comparing myself to all these people that do this for a living? They pitch their lifestyle in daily vlogs or perfectly posed pictures done with a $$$ camera or professional photographer. Why, oh why, do I keep comparing myself to them? I hate the current trend with obsession of personality which is why I deleted my Facebook. Your brand is a narcissistic reflection of you. I think I'm so annoyed by it because its so hard to avoid being drawn into it. Human nature is a bitch.

Big Sis meets Little Sis

Let me give myself some real talk for a second.... You have a two year old whirlwind of a toddler. You have a new 8 week old baby girl. You are exclusively breastfeeding and it is HARD. You are only just starting to get into a routine and your husband just went back to work so you are all by yourself. In three short weeks you are going back to your full time job as an engineer who is the breadwinner of her family. So you can't be the coolest blogger/youtuber/guru ever. GET OVER IT.

It's ok to be average and not a special snowflake. In fact, more people should probably embrace it. They would be a lot happier.

So honestly I don't really know the point of this post or what the future of the blog is. I want to continue it I really do, but at the same time I have a life crammed completely full and I want to be present for all the ups and downs of that as well. I don't really know if I have any goals, and I don't know if I want to set any. I think my favorite thing about blogging or making youtube videos is the chance to look back on that fleeting moment in my life, and I have to remember that when I feel the pressure to conform or perform. But I think I like those memories so much that it's so hard not to try and pick up the baton again.

I guess I just wanted to get my thoughts down on the page, or in the cloud, or whatever. It has been hard to find my niche when I am still trying to find myself. I hope to post my thoughts or glimpses of my life here. Maybe every other week. Maybe once a month. We'll see.

xoxo,
Kevlyn

9 months // little leprechaun

Baby girl you are 9 months old! I can't believe that you have now spent more time in the world outside of me than in. 

Everyday we notice a new skill, surprising, exciting, and bittersweet. You are on the brink of being truly mobile, although we have already begun baby proofing. You are able to roll almost anywhere and have just began to army crawl. You love to hold onto mom and dad and show off how well you can stand up! Sitting is easy and you love to kick your legs.

"Ma", "da", "ba", are just some of your babbles that are becoming more and more like really words and speech. You love to copy intonation and are definitely practicing with your volume!

You flirt with strangers all the time, acting coy, but we can tell you love the attention. Using your gestures is great fun, pointing at everything that interests you, clapping, and waving "bye-bye".

You love to read books and help mommy and daddy turn the pages. Daddy also taught you how to blow raspberries. Your favorite foods are blueberries, strawberries, avocado, broccoli, and spinach.

The best development for mom and dad is that you sleep through the night! (Most of the time anyway) 

We love you so!

Xoxo

Mommy

7 months.

Baby girl, you are 7 months old and full of personality. Bright blue eyes and light brown hair. We have to clip it to the side already to keep it out of your face! No teeth yet, but plenty of drool. You love to be scared and giggle, snort, and laugh. "Da" is your favorite thing to babble, "Dada" as Karl likes to remind me. You also know "Baba" and "Ts" and how to blow bubbles. You can sit assisted, a master of tummy time and rolling. Not crawling yet, but we are guessing that it will be any day now.

Eating is a daily activity and you get to try everything that we eat, from avocado to ravioli. You smack your lips when I'm cutting up your bananas and apple. However, a good portion seems to go off the table as a treat for the dog. The only bad thing about the food is the stinky poops that come out! It makes cloth diapering a bit more interesting. Good thing daddy installed the sprayer on the toilet downstairs.

You are growing so fast I can barely remember how small you were (although you weren't that small at almost 9 pounds). You love to make music or listen to jazz, dancing around the house with Daddy making big kicks. Every day you read books and you talk at the pictures, or yell, covering your face with them while wiggling or gnawing on the end of the page. The kitties are very exciting and you love to pet Oscar. You also like to bounce up and down in your jumper. It seems like you would do it for hours on end if we would let you.

We love you so Andy Wren.

xoxo

K

Ravioli Slumber

Last night A ate a whole ravioli. She is really getting the hang of this eating thing. Then, she slept until 5 AM!

In other news, I woke up at 4:30 AM to discover that my breasts had become filled with achy rocks and were porn star size.

You win some, you lose some.